Tor: hacking your tiny universe in service to the NSA

Obama supported the NSA because XYZ. Hillary Clinton will be elected the first female president because idiots like novelty, and she will make symbolic reforms that won’t change anything, including giving the NSA a slap on the wrist. No one cares, and everyone accepts they can be easily surveilled by who knows who at any time doing almost anything. The privacy people care because they have something to hide, highlighting the absurdity of socialization: they care more what strangers think of them in public than what they think of themselves in private.

Tor (the onion router) is this: brilliant programmers, some of whom got caught in clandestine attacks, and have now switched teams. Its users and contributors are also 9% transgender and 23% homosexual. In an extramoral sense, know that what you do is not wrong, it’s incorrect. Your determination to prove the opposite will only confirm this, so skip that, be semi-discreet, remain the funniest people on the planet, and accept that conservative society will shun you. Lesbians, some men will always be stronger than you.

For the rest, it’s very simple: stop with your animal porn and your media piracy, and you shouldn’t have anything to worry about. People have been hacked with some nasty trojans from Tor, but only 5% of these were doing normal browsing and email when their machines were compromised. Guess what the rest were doing.

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