If all Marvel/DC related movies were even nearly as good as this, intelligent people who know film would watch them. But we don’t because they’re not, which makes this more than a breath of fresh air. It’s actually just a brilliant movie all of its own accord and really doesn’t deserve to be associated with […]Read more "Joker (2019)"
Moviegoers and critics have probably praised this as highly entertaining, thrilling, captivating, and maybe even “scary.” To some degree they’re probably right, but it’s also in large parts hacky bullshit, with a propensity to reduce the complexities of life to happy horseshit. If you’re confused, I’ll simplify to keep the word count down: happy horseshit noun. comforting illusions […]Read more "It (2017)"
If you were an honest critic who valued his time, you’d give this thing a rating of absolute zero. That’s negative four hundred and fifty nine and two third degrees Fahrenheit, and a fitting scale of measure for how bad it is because it’s the worst film of all time. No, really. It’s the absolute […]Read more "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 (2017)"
This movie wants to tell you there is heaven at the end of hell and attempts to do so by putting you through the movie hell of viewer annoyance, while the plot tries to illustrate the hell of obsession with fame. Ultimately it fails, because it’s a buddy-buddy flick for people in the industry to […]Read more "Birdman (2014)"
This movie was ahead of its time in a way last year’s Interstellar is not. Forty years from now, it will still be seen as more brave and more honest than Nolan’s cheeseball mindtravel. The latter isn’t ahead of our time at all, only smarter than its target audience. Big difference. The modern Planet of the Apes remakes don’t even deserve to be […]Read more "Planet of the Apes (1968)"
This movie is perfect nihilism, and perfect trash. It says nothing and is about everything. It toys with your belief in the greater good, and programs you with its own flawed method of exploring the unknown through suspension of disbelief. It takes you to every place every movie of its type has ever taken you before, then goes one step further, […]Read more "Interstellar (2014)"
Ruh roh, Smaug the magnificent is stirring, and he smells the blood of a halfling burglar, come to retrieve the magical Dwarvish Arkenstone from his lair under the mountain, where he sleeps and sleeps, all day and all night, because, you see, he’s got all the gold and treasure in the world but nothing to […]Read more "The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (2013)"
If this movie can teach us anything in historiological terms, it’s that the world was more naive in 1992. That’s only 20 years ago, but it seems further away. What it can teach us in spiritual terms is that all the doom and gloom of the current time cannot kill the spirit that connects with […]Read more "Leaving Normal (1992)"
Terrence Malick’s take on the legend of Pocahontas, loosely based on disputed history, is that of the Native American girl (androgynous Q’orianka Kilcher) who stole the heart of British captain John Smith (Collin Farrel), and bridged the divide between English colonialists and her fellow feral Indians in the new unexplored, unmolested world. On one hand, it’s a […]Read more "The New World (2005)"
Punch Drunk Love is what Anger Management could have been: a careful study of the explosive and hilarious effects of pent up anger and frustration as best exemplified by the enigma that is Adam Sandler. More than that, it’s a genuinely funny romantic comedy that has the audacity to find meaning in a simple but […]Read more "Punch Drunk Love (2002)"